I Named Him Dave

When I chose the name for this last guy, nothing was coming to mind, so I took the name of the man I lost my virginity to. When I think of the original Dave, I realize the whole situation was fucked up, but I don't regret a single thing! For some reason, I loved that man, and I know that he will always be there for me if I need him! However, I was always the "other" woman. Yes, I knew...and I let myself be runner up. At the time, I thought that one day he would see all the good in me. Young and foolish is all I can say. BUT, I don't feel anger towards him at all. I was thinking of these positive feeling when I named the new boy after him. Well, I guess the name is always going to have negative actions associated with it:(

Last night, I met Dave for coffee. A meeting that I really didn't think twice about. After about an hour of talking and me spilling my hot chocolate on him, he breaks the mood with "the reason why I wanted to meet you...." Before he could even get the sentence out, my brain was going a mile a minute. Yet another man in this town that is so good at taking and than walking away. Well, it turns out that he was on a "break" with his girlfriend when he met me, and now they are getting back together. The more I think about it, I realize that I would be completely fine with this if he didn't sleep with me. However, that action just made him a douche bag!!!!!!! The bottom line is if he is looking for things in me obviously he isn't satisfided with his girlfriend. I just hope that she fucked around on him too, or I just feel sooo sorry for that girl. A "break" to me means we need to work on ourselves not we need to go fuck anything in site! After Dave told me this very enlightening news, he followed it with "I never thought I could meet a girl like you out here....its hard out here." News flash buddy, you are the reason why its so hard. Guys like you that think they can just do whatever they want to whoever they want. Yeah I play off this tough girl image, but that shit hurts like hell! Then, he went on to tell me he didn't want me to waste my time. Wow...yes he really said that...basically, he meant he was a waste of time, and I guess I was right when I thought he was intelligent.

My attitude did a complete 180. First, I thanked him for actually being man enough to tell me to my face. However, I was also thinking that he was "man enough" to cheat as well. Then, I turned into the Kiki that just tells it like it is. I wish that Kiki could be present ALL the time! I told him he could read my blog now (because he asked about it earlier, and I wouldn't tell him anything about it). I explained what it was about and that he was in it. I told him that I pretty much pin pointed him. I mean the 4-5 days off were probably with her (it all is so clear now). Then, I just kept talking about how I viewed relationships and him for about 20 more minutes. I made a good point about how since his parents were divorced that is ok in his brain. Where mine have been married for 36 years, and those are the role models I look up to everyday of my life. He ended with he still wants to be friends and come see a show...blah blah blah. I finished my getting into my car and instantly deleting his number:)

I'm so glad I let myself simmer for over 24 hours. After I slept on it, I admitted that I had been over looking multiple things. First impressions are huge, and really shouldn't be over looked. The first think I thought when I saw him was "Armenian Douche Bag." Ok, so he isn't Armenian, but he does resemble one, and he dresses like them (sorry to stereotype). His appearance alone was not dad worthy. My dad would have taken one look at him, and disliked him instantly. Then, there was the slow "short bus" responses. There were so many conversations that I thought were one sided because it took him soooo long to reply verbally to me. He would always come back with a very in tune comment, but it seemed like his engine was firing, but not igniting. Which brings me to the last thing I was overlooking....POT. Yeah, he had told me that he had gotten high twice just in that short time we were conversing. Who knows how many times he actually smoked up??? I don't want someone that does any type of drug!! I know I just excluded about 95% of California's population, but that is what I want!

I know I have made this point before, but I'm going to do it again because I feel like it is very important. Women, if I man is making you cry (for any reason) within the first 4 months of dating, GET OUT!! If it is starting like that, how could anything good come from it? I give this advise so easy, but I still need to remind myself to live by it. Dave made me cry about three weeks into knowing him....RED FLAG! Another thing, if you have a pet, and they don't like your potential significant other, please take note! They can sense it!! My cat was never comfortable around Dave, and he would constantly be watching him. He knew the whole time that Dave was no good.

Well, I guess my no dating anyone from the bar is back into affect. Also, my two month rule is back on...so I am a born again virgin;) However, my new solo is going to rock because I have new material to tap into!! (There is always a positive.)

Well, I hope my hot chocolate didn't stain his Armenian clothes...haha!

On to the next one...
xoxo
Kiki