Time Out

That's what I need....a TIME OUT! I need to step back and try to understand why I look at the potential in a man instead of who he actually is!! I never want to have to wonder if he likes me. I don't want to second guess myself when I want to call him. I don't want to have to bargain with him in order to see him! All those things should just happen. At first, I thought that maybe I am attracted to the challenge in men like this. But the more I think about it...I would much rather cut the drama out and just "be" with a man! When I use to live with Ben, I looked forward to coming home to him EVERY night! I loved the idea of sleeping beside the same man every night and waking up to him in the morning! I'm a one man kind of girl!! I just don't know where that one man is hiding...hahaha!

Alan hasn't tried to contact me. He either isn't interested, or he is following my directions of waiting until he is ready. Don't worry...I am leaning toward the first one!! Carl is being very persistant, but my gut tells me to stay away! He is just a little too much for me at the moment. If Alan would have been like Carl, I would have loved it! The wrong guy is giving me the attention I want...I guess.

I have decided to keep myself busy because I need to take a time out from men in general. I need to get my footing back!! I need to get back to the place where "winking" is ok!

xoxo
Kiki